Friday, February 24, 2012

Disney World Trip Report - Day 5

Jill made me get up early today. Grr.

Typical morning at the food court. A bunch of creeps. Plenty of food. Plenty of drink. All of it on the floor. Let's move on and never speak of this place ever again.

It seems like most people consider Animal Kingdom to be a half day park but our half day park would have to be Hollywood Studios. We got over there quick and early this morning so we could grab Fast Passes for the Toy Story ride. I had something to prove but it would have to wait until noonish.

Star Tours was old and crappy last time we were there. That was not the case today. They spruced up the queue with new, old jokes and replaced this:

With this:

They've finally done away with Captain Rex and his perpetual first flight. Did I mention it was in 3D?
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After that I really wanted to see Ken Marino and an old lady so we went on Rock N Rollercoaster: Sponsored by Hanes. This is the only Hollywood themed ride that's nothing like Hollywood. Nobody goes that fast on the freeways out there.
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Jill is a big fan of roller coasters even though they scare the crap out of her.

We had our fill of Aerosmith but still had some time to kill. There is no better attraction than The Great Movie Ride (most creative name ever) to kill time. The line was very short which made the experience all the better. Magic awaited in the form of an awkward girl with a microphone. There are tour guides that really get into this ride as well as those that phone it in. We got neither. I don't remember her name but I'll venture a guess she doesn't have many friends on account of her complete lack of personality. I knew from the start it was going to be spectacular. People generally hate the gangster option but in my experience it's way more entertaining. The guy doing the gangster bit was equally awesome. His over-zealousness was immediately stymied by the lack of haste the ride vehicles exhibit. Moments later Ms. Enthusiasm returned and the last few shiny faced movie characters pivoted awkwardly as children looked on, confused. Easily the best 20 minutes of the trip.

Jill and I were so impressed with Star Tours we went on it again. It was Wookielicious.

I wanted an ice cream sandwich so we stopped by a stand that was operated by a very nice girl that attended the same college I did. I should have known better than to start talking about Disneyland but thankfully we were saved by another customer craving an ice cream sandwich.

It was still too early to go on Toy Story so we went looking for snacks via New York.
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Then San Francisco.
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All I wanted was a stinking soft pretzel (which I want right now as well) and nobody in that stinking park was selling them! After traversing the entire park we asked somebody who directed us back to where we started. There was a line there and some lady farted. Jill got a churro and I got my darned pretzel.

Look at the time! It's Toy Story time! The Fast Pass queue wasn't clogged with a Brazillion people (get it?) so we got right on. Or at least we would have had they not decided to move us to another line so they could let the next three cars go empty. Swines. Jill got close to beating my score but thankfully I have much stronger arms than her so I can fire off more shots. It makes for a pretty lousy accuracy score. I'm still proud of myself. Jill got the beaver.
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Next up was my favorite attraction, Lights, Motors, Action. We grabbed some pretty swell seats right up front but they were still uncomfortable. Thankfully there wasn't anybody in front of us so I didn't have to maneuver my knees between some girthy individual. Apparently Lighning McQueen is Disney's most beloved car. Suck it, Herbie.
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We gradually made our way through the stunt show crowd which took us over to Star Tours for a third spin. We got a combination of our prior two visits but it was still good stuff. That was enough excitement for us. Time to hit up some shops then leave. We picked up a couple of ceramic mugs that don't hold very much liquid but they look pretty neat. They were gigantic with the protective wrapping so we took them back to the hotel to drop them off. I did the locker thing and apparently left my room key/pass/money with the key lady. It's a good thing we went back to the hotel. I hit up the front desk and took care it. With a fresh card in hand we went to the food court. I had the tie dyed cheesecake. I was not a fan.
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Thoroughly nourished we got back on a bus and headed to the Magic Kingdom. The first thing on our agenda was to inconvenience a Photopass guy by asking him to take our picture.
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Jill photographed the poorly tended to roses while I Tweeted.
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We got our Peoplemover on which awesome but I don't need to tell you. There's more to Tomorrowland than just the Peoplemover. They also have the Carousel of Freaking PROGRESS!!!
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Jill managed to break the zipper on her shorts (which I promise I will fix before Spring) so we had to find a safety pin. The Emporium obliged with may be the only safety pin at the Magic Kingdom. Modesty restored, we headed off to find some dinner.

We went to Columbia Harbor House. Jill had good food. I had food. That's all I want to say about that. The apple thingy I had for dessert was okay. Since there wasn't anybody around we took turns steering the restaurant. Or at least there weren't people until I took the helm.
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I had a hankering for the Haunted Mansion or more importantly the new graveyard. The park was mostly empty so we wandered around and took photos.
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Apppropriately haunted we moseyed over to Tent City er I mean Fantasyland to snap some evening photos and Tweet about snapping evening photos. Soon music swelled and this happened for a few minutes.
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Everybody there seemed to like them which means they've never seen "Remember... Dreams Come True" at Disneyland. It started raining lightly and people were all like, "Oooo fireworks, AAAAAA RAIN!!!"

After the hooplah was over with we sauntered over to Snow White's Scary Adventure since they're going to doze it to make room for something retail oriented or chair storage or something else. I didn't feel like looking it up. Snow White's Scary Adventure has a whole lot more adventure than the abruptly ending Snow White's etc at Disneyland.

It was still raining so we went to the locker to fetch our raincoats to ensure it would stop raining. Guess what! It stopped raining.

I wanted to go on Pirates etc so that's what we did.
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I'm not sure whose idea it was to go on Splash Mountain but it was probably mine. Okay, it was me. We had our raincoats and I'd never been on this one before. We got the coveted front seats (are they coveted?) in a boat with... additional weight. We almost submerged numerous times and got thoroughly doused after the drop. Jill got it worse even though she was sitting right next to me.
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People had pretty much cleared out because of the little bit of rain we got. When extra magic hours began we enjoyed some additional magic. There was the usual assortment of riffraff trying to comprehend what extra magic hours were. The poor souls were trying to track down the member of their party with their Motel 6 room key not comprehending that they needed to be a guest at a Disney resort.

As always we headed to the Peoplemover to finish off the night but the bastards closed it. Didn't they know we were coming? I was reasonably mad.

Jill grabbed some stellar castle photos while I got some closeups of the castle.
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Still broken hearted about the Peoplemover we decided that we needed some sweets from the candy shop which I ate back at the room.

Even though it was late there was still a mess of people waiting for the bus. We survived another day. Day five. What a day it was. Day six coming up. It's going to be a doozie. You've been warned.

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